Some Richly-Deserved Side-Effects

“Deserved: Highly merited and just” – Oxford English Dictionary

We’ve always cheered on attention-obsessed, big-lie pushing sociopaths instead of real leaders

Thus, we have earned the right to enjoy repression, poverty & war under their vanity-driven regimes

We demanded ever-increasing dEfense budgets as we patriotically slashed education & entitlements

Guess we shouldn’t be too surprised that some 71% of those aged 17-35 fail military admission tests

Coal marketeers assured us mountain top removal, mercury & CO2 emissions were safe for families

So ADHD kids cough as we adjust thermostats to T-shirt comfort in record heat, under polluted skies

They promised us the better jobs of tomorrow and lots of savings when they sent our jobs overseas

But, instead now they offshore both engineering and design just to keep their huge bonuses flowing

Big Oil said fracking would patriotically yield us clean Energy Independence from greedy arab sheiks

Really, they’re sticking us with no alternatives and the cleanup exporting that Energy Independence

You always sarcastically dismissed their socialist nannying over smoking, obesity and lack of exercise

OK, but diabetes got your foot, just breathing is hard and your heart is simply shot-Happy Ever After!

You proudly made damn sure they never passed any form of gun control WhatSoEver - Gotnam it!

But they watch your every move & know all about your guns, when you use them & how to take them

Yes, you’ve stockpiled guns & ammo against gov’t drones and those black UN helicopters in the night

But I’ll bet you’d just wind up shooting each other over food scraps from your faux-military pickups

You spent thousands of hours at boring jobs ‘just can’t waiting for’ that next big 3 day weekend

But you can’t remember which from when and somehow most of the selfies got lost on your phone

You knew better than to waste precious tax$ on that, whatever it was, national infrastructure scam

So it’s cool that the water’s bad, the roads are worn out, the grid is broken and the internet is slow

You scornfully reject that dam Obamacare – Yup, to hell with them moochers and gov’t death panels!

But you did wind up paying a parasite lawyer to guide you thru your healthcare-induced bankruptcy

You spent thousands playing the fool just to be sure your precious children would be your friends

Apparently it worked cause now it looks like they’re back home to stay: 30ish, jobless & in debt

With all the cool stuff you really needed, you never even saved enough for one family emergency

Then, your unexpected forced early retirement at 55 left you deep in debt, depressed and unhealthy

Corporate scientists introduced many time & money-saving chemicals they never had to safety test

Now all our kids are lazy, autistic, sickly slow learners and we’re all obese & pre-cancerous

It was easy to ascribe the terrible sufferings of others to your omnipotent God’s mysterious ways

Feels different now that you’re weak & old, the wife’s demented and your kids only call for money

You always said you’d never want to live to be 60 and those old people had a for-real duty to pass

Turns out that 80 is the new 60 since every new expensive medical trick is paid for by your Medicare

You derisively rejected their calls to recycle and smirkingly dumped your household toxics as well

If your dumbdowned heaven existed, you’d see grandkids cursing you as they mine your filthy legacy

You studied only pointless sports stats, twisted political soundbites and smarmy blockbuster lines

Got any hipster clichés now as you lay, tubes going in and out, so very still & pale-On your deathbed?