He’s now a part-time God

Look, He still knows all about everything but it seems like these days He’s just not online all the time

His individual plans for each of us are still in effect but maybe He’s not monitoring 24x7x365 currently

OK, it’s an issue…But, His customer support teams in our world are busy, trying to pick up the slack

These earthly minions must now rationalize ever more horrific events as part of His Mysterious Ways

I’m thinking maybe He might be like semi-retired what with all the awful stuff that’s been happening

At times you get gospel music & ‘Your prayer is very important to us…’ during our personal dialogues

Even commoners can plainly see that His omnipotence isn’t always working everywhere, all the time

But His priests, rabbis, preachers & imams do remain clueless as to the cause of these long outages

Maybe there are big issues in distant galaxies, but then, that never affected His omnipresence before

If it were anybody else, I’d have to at least ask if there might be some pay for looking the other way

For instance, greedy CEOs are living like kings til 90 while little girls get gunned down in classrooms

Could it be possible that some of this results from outsourcing portions of His work to like demigods?

Make no mistake, there are still times when we just know He’s been there, watching over us in grace

But: Scientific studies show that Divine Intervention is down some 60-70% since the last Dark Ages :)

However, the price of eternal salvation has not dropped at all during all of these last 5000 years

In the meantime, the devil’s heathen idols have picked up huge numbers of apostates, worldwide

Many Conservatives argue that it’s simply divine retribution & not merely His inattention to our ways

Perhaps that does indeed explain the success of those violent, heretical, caliphate-seeking jihadis

But why would the increasing numbers of poor, unwanted & abused children be punished from birth?

Is it possible that His merciful grace is capped at under 8 billion souls on this one small blue planet?

None of His agents of any stripe will comment on His impossible, but obvious, intermittent absences

Yet, certainly we hear increasingly strident calls to greater faith to soothe His possible ire with us

The amoral among us have posited that divine record-keeping has possibly been reduced as well…

Still - The true faithful continue to toe the line, ever fearful of losing the promise of eternal paradise

There’s a movement to part-time faith and many others now say they worship at home, in private

There are also many reports of sporadic power of prayer outages in many areas across the globe

Yet, many of His franchisees here on earth just go on about their business like nothing has happened

For, as ever, many declare that the richness of His plan shall only be revealed in the fullness of time

Perhaps it’s merely a work slowdown intended to focus attention on our blessing-entitled mindset

Surely America’s decreasing exceptionist indulgences are directly linked to lack of a divine presence

In any case, our politicians incessant imperative that ‘God Bless America’ seems far less effective

Maybe it’s just some kind of an auto-pilot malfunction or another type of heavenly technical glitch

There may be a backup in processing all the martyrs & innocent people we have sent along lately

Possibly He’s getting on towards retirement and has simply decided to slow down a little bit

Or, perhaps He wants to spend more time with His family and His other interests – as outed CEOs say

After all, what are the joys of 24x7x365 attention to every atom in the universe & all our petty lives?